Hoe vrienden winnen en mensen beïnvloeden

door Vulpius

How to Win Friends and Influence People, een boek uit 1936, door Dale Carnegie. Het originele werk wordt nog vaak gelezen door mensen in de marketing en de sales, of door iedereen die graag mensen naar zijn of haar hand wil zetten.

Een tip: lees gewoon onderstaande samenvatting van Dale Carnegie zelf. Het boek is ondertussen immers sterk gedateerd (zoals bijvoorbeeld het vergelijken van mensen met honden, compleet met bijhorende training in de vorm van het geven van vlees – ja, letterlijk!).

Deel I – Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Deel II – Six ways to make people like you

1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
6. Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.

Deel III – Win people to your way of thinking

1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.

Deel IV – Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
A leader’s job often includes changing your people’s attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:

1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

Advertenties